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Which Arm? by Taylor Spalding On the European continent lay a small hamlet called Lunn. The town, having no church, adopted golf as its official community activity. The townspeople were enthralled with the game and devoted much of their time to the craftmenship of building golf clubs, golf courses, and attending to various ammenties surrounding the game. Not in all the land was there a better place to play the game or barter for golf goods. The workers formed guilds so as to pass on their knowledge to the next generation of craftsmen. People from all over would travel to the tiny town with the very specific idea of playing golf and buying golf related goods. Hence the village became quite prosperous. With the leisure afforded by their hard work many of the townspeople became proficient at playing the game as well. News of the town travelled quickly and it wasn't long before word of the place fell on the ears of the despotic golfer and plunderer Dante Baville. In a jealous rage Baville gathered his army and set out to conquer the town of Lunn. In a seige from the West he did just that. The crown jewel of Lunn, a beautiful golf course which wrapped around the town square, was declared property of the new ruler. The craftsmen were declared slaves to the dictator and the great players of Lunn were banned from playing golf except under one condition: Anyone who wished to play golf would have to have one arm cut off. The new ruler declared this condition because of his arrogant will to be the best player in the hamlet of Lunn. But in a show of twisted mercy he also declared that if any player could beat him while playing one-handed he would abandon his occupation of Lunn and restore the land to its people. The Players guild, which was now outlawed, gathered secretly to discuss the solution. Several of the brave members were willing to sacrifice a limb in order to oust the despot. But a heated argument arose as to which arm to lop off. Just by coincidence all the players were right-handed and swung the club from right to left on the downswing. Which arm should be cut off? This story is dedicated to the readers of rec.sport.golf newsgroup. |
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